Emotional

Wow, I totally set myself up to fall apart today. 

Today was Austin's last day at Nanny's Daycare.  He started going there back when he was 9 and a half months old.  They have been great to him and all of our friends' kids go there.  Until last Monday it was the only licensed daycare in our vicinity for 60+ miles, so it was an obvious choice for us.  The problem was I had to drive 7 miles north to drop him off, 7 miles back, literally passing my house and then to work which is 14 miles west of town.  So all that times 2 every day and my commute was an hour and a half over 56 miles. 

Last Monday my employer finally opened their child care facility which is called the Kaibab Tribal Learning Center (TLC).  Instead of just a daycare it is a learning environment for 2-5 year olds.  Since it is only 3 miles from my office, switching him there is going to save us time (50 minutes) and money ($4.50 in gas).  It was a tough decision because there was no bad blood with Nanny's, but it just makes sense to switch him.

So back to my emotional meltdown, today was his last day at Nanny's.  Before I dropped him off I stopped at the store and got two vases of flowers for the Nanny's and cookies for the kids.  I dropped him off with no problem.  When I was driving there to pick him up I was listening to the country music station and they played that Tim McGraw song "If you're reading this" in honor of Memorial Day.  I knew that I should have turned the channel because that song tears at my heart strings.  I left it though and of course got all emotional and teared up.  I finally hit the dial and turned the station and tried to compose myself.  When I got in the daycare though they were going on and on about how they will miss Austin and if we ever need them again to let them know.  Then Austin's little 4 year old girlfriend Mer looked at me and said in her most serious and grown up voice "Sarah, why are you taking Austin to another daycare?"  It broke my heart and the tears started flowing, I totally lost it.  I felt like such a sap for crying like that.  I think had I not listened to that song I would have been ok, but since I was already on the emotional roller coaster I set myself up for the plunge.

I hope that we are making the right decision in moving him to the TLC.  Part of the move involves attempting to potty train him.  The TLC does not have a diapering area set up, but the Director said he would take Austin and work on potty training him.  We are going to give it a go at home this weekend to get him ready.  We have not tried until now because I felt like at Nanny's they were always so busy with 16 kids and I feared that they would not have the time to devote to working with him, so it was easier to leave him in diapers rather then set him up for frustration.  So far at the TLC they have two other kids, one of which went to Nanny's with Austin, to share three teachers, so Austin will definitely have one-on-one attention there.